Comming Home Day 8 Death and Dying

I talked to Elijah a friend of mine a couple of times a year and while I was in town I tried to chat with him a little but he said he was taking care of his son. I called him later and we spoke for a few minutes and tried to arrange a time to get together. We agreed that we would try to get together later in the week. He had sounded tired. I thought his son who was only 3 months was wearing him out a little. “Erin” he said in even more somber tone, “one more thing before I let you go……” Aughh shit I said this doesn’t sound like it’s gonna be good news. “Whats up.” I replied. “You remember Frank right.” He paused. “Ya of course.” Frank had worked with us at our former place of employment. “He died last night.” Elijah’s voice trailed off a bit I heard him say cancer and something else. I came back to reality and thought about what he was saying as he recited the calling hours and the funeral time. Frank was a good guy. Too good. He went to church, didn’t drink or smoke, exercised regularly and watched his weight. He had his Masters in something or other and was the least likely candidate for an early death in my opinion at least. Just like anyone who gets bad news I wanted to pass it on as quickly as possible before it infected me some how. I called our former employer and relayed the news to a friend of mine named Kevin. It was late by now so he decided to wait till the next day to tell every one. Our former employer was nice enough to send flowers to the funeral home the next day for the wake despite the fact that Franks employment was over 3 years ago and lasted only a year and a half. I went to the wake with a bit of a strange feeling. I liked Frank thought he was a nice guy and never really had any problems with him. But we were complete opposites my life of sin and excess didn’t make any sense to him and his life of purity didn’t make any sense to me. Fortunately I was able to get a appointment with my friend Kevin to have some beers after the wake so I had something to look forward too. When I arrived I didn’t know anyone until Elijah got there. He introduced me to Franks sister and I told her I was sorry for her loss. We looked at some pictures of Frank together and I stood behind while others kneeled at the coffin. I don’t pray. As I stood there I noticed the large basket of flowers sent by our former employer. I tried to point this out to Elijah but he wasn’t listening to me I think, although I know I had mentioned that Janice a co-worker who still worked at our former company had arranged to send flowers on behalf of the company. Elijah and I made our way to the back and were soon joined by another former coworker Mark and his wife. We talked for a bit when Kevin from our former company joined us. The exchanges were mostly pleasant till Elijah said “Do you think your company will send flowers.” Kevin was not the person who would be in charge of such an endeavor at his company so he did not know. He related that he had received the word from me and had passed it on to Franks former boss. I was uneasy from this point on and was trying to find any exit possible to get out of former vs. current employee land. Eventually we called it a done deal and moved on. Most deaths are not fun events. This was no different. I met Kevin out side and we went down the street for a drink. I liked Kevin when we worked together a lot for three major reasons: 1 He knew more than anyone about almost any given facet of the business. 2. He always looked at the glass as if it was half full positive. Positive attitude 3. Finally he was easy to work for and with and understood how to treat people fairly. He related to me a few things that I already knew about the current company’s state of affairs. But he ended everything with a positive instead of a negative. We remarked about how another employee had recently gotten a award and how good it had made Kevin feel to here his name mentioned as a role model for him. It would have made me proud too. He told me that he was going to be taking care of the IT dept and want to try to keep it up to the same standard as what Jim my former boss had attained. We ended the night after a few cold ones and some food with the bill that Kevin graciously paid. It was like the Ying and Yang of nights funerals suck but a couple of beers with good people kinda canceled things out.